Lee Maracle ——————————————————eeeeeeeeeereeeeeeeeeeeee empathy for Paulie. The fear gone, her tone took on the finality Paulie now loathed. The story lost all joy for Paulie. A hazy image of a woman, book inhand, rose above the sound of the woman’s voice. There were smiles all over her, even her hands seemed to smile as she reached for Paulie. Her image tried to rise above the picture of screaming scarlet leaves. The image of Mommy fought for a while with the picture of falling leaves. He could see her mouth move. Her words failed to erase the sound of the leaves who pleaded for their lives. He tried to bury the sound of screamingleaves so he could hear hismommy. The screaming wouldnotgoaway. Mommy’s soft voice could notdrown the screams and, finally, the image of her lost the fight and the screaming leaves seemed to weep. A lonetear hid behind Paulie’seyes. Ittried toescape but failed. Fora brief moment Paulie felt sorry for the leaves. Hishand wentup in the air as though to reach out and comfort them. They were too far away. His hand hung suspended for a second, then fell helplessly tohisside. He tried toremember theleaves, the woman,and the sound of her, to hold the images still, but they slipped away. Inthe days and weeks that followed peopledisappeared except for the occasional visit by one or two of them at a time. Paulie didn’t care much for the women who came unless they brought other children with them. They tended to behave as though he were each one of their personal toys. Gramma used these moments to complain about him, called him a handful, and the aunt who was visiting always supported her by bawling Paulie out. Big large fingers were shaken at him for things he couldn’t remember doing. During these times, Paulie learned to be inconspicuous. Asanauntarrived he retreated to some corner and busied himself at nothing. The uncles were easier to take. They accepted his invisibility more readily then did his aunts. Gramma’s small complaints were met only by grunts from the men. They never interfered with his upbringing in the same way hisauntsdid. Wasn’tany of their business. Noone ever talked about Mommy - notour way, they said. By the time Paulie found the words to ask about his mom, he no longer wanted to know the answer. Mostly, the house was empty. It felt lonely. There was a deep sadness all about the house. 1t filled every room. He stopped looking out the window somuch. Itdidn’t seemto help. The feeling of sadness grew almost comfortable compared to the wasted hope that lay in searching the window for something he could no longer define. Daddy came by once in a while in the beginning. He had grown morose and Paulie came to dread his arrival. At the same time, he 105