Dorothy Christian

to go to more of those conferences. Until now she only
went if there was not anything else to do. Well, from
now on, she would not allow other things to take prece-
dence. Maybe some of those books written by Indian
women that she kept hearing about had some of the
answers...

Jeanne did not know what the answers were. She was
slowly coming to realize and understand what the Elders
were saying when they said the men and women of
Indian communities had to start healing themselves so
they could be whole people again. It was becoming
clearer to Jeanne what these speakers meant when they
said that Indian people could not be whole again as
families, or as communities, until they were whole indi-
viduals.

Jeanne knew she had to work on becoming a whole
woman, a whole person. She made a promise to herself
to find out how to seek out someone to do a sweatlodge
for her, to begin the journey toward healing when she
returned from Vancouver. Jeanne realized, no, she knew
somewhere deep inside herself that her own Indian ways
was the only way she could heal her violated spirit,
mind, and body. She knew it was the only way to re-
move the stench of death from her.

The next morning, Jeanne travelled to Vancouver.
She had dressed extra carefully so that the bruises on her
body did not show. The physical damage was easily
covered and hidden but the psychological, emotional,
and spiritual wounds would only be felt by her, in the
very depths of her being. Jeanne knew it would take
time to heal and something told her she had to do it
alone. It would take time to fully understand what had
happened in this three month relationship which had

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